Defeat

This life is so full of frustration, heartache and pain, no I know that's not news to you who read this, but don't quit reading just yet...

Sins and hindrances
So church last sunday... we had a different type of service in which at the end, to symbolize those things which have been in our way of a closer relationship with God were given up to him. This was done by writing on a simple 3x5 card whatever that person/event/recurring problem might be and throwing it away--wouldn't you know, the one and ONLY thing I wrote down jumped out and attacked me this week. I though a part of this "problem" was solved a few years ago (or maybe I had just hoped it had faded away). What frustrates me most is that it's not MY problem, it's someone else's, which clearly means I should be able to get past it, but no, that is not the case.

I felt totally deflated Thursday just before 12:30pm. The sadness related to this person had come back, but my first thoughts were of that little card I threw in the trashcan at church. But I realized, it isn't my problem, it may make me sad and rightly so, but it does not have to control any other aspect of my life. My decisions have been made. I choose only how I live and I will not live that person's life.

Choose not to be defeated. God doesn't tell us to give him our burdens for nothing. No, that's not easy--certainly not, CHOOSE to have joy so inexpressible in words that it bursts forth in all other aspects of your life. Then surround yourself with whatever people and reading and preaching and WHATEVER that will help you live that life of inexpressible, irrepressible JOY.

(hmmm... I'm not totally sure, but that might have been a soap box moment, take it as you like.)