Life can be broken down into the different struggles we face.
How interesting.
I find myself posting once again with the book of James as the "inspiration."
Last week I chatted with a friend of mine about one of my (many) struggles. It's quite silly actually. Many times we bargain with God... "Dear Lord, thank you for [insert blessings here]. Please take care of Uncle Bob, make him well, support his family. Oh and God, if I do this for you (i.e. be kind to someone who is hateful, read my bible, memorize scripture etc.) will you do this for me (find me a house, make life easier, fix all my problems)."
I don't find that God likes people to bargain with him, it's his way, that's it. Yes, sometimes he gives us what we have asked for despite the fact that in reality we don't need it and sometimes we will regret the request later.
But to be a bit more personal, the struggle I was dealing with again was the regular and consistent reading of my Bible. To take that time alone with God and really enjoy, listen and learn from the God that has saved me from so many accidents (literal and figurative).
Why is it so hard to read the Bible? Why when I know how much I truly like doing so and how much I see God speak to me when I do?
I've identified two reasons--because that's what one does if one is me--analyze. 1- I fear God will ask of me something I do not wish to do. I have given so many things to God, he has control over the job I have, over the money I earn, friendships I have and here I sit afraid that the God that has safely seen me travel thousands of miles, given me a house to live in, food to eat, a family that loves me and innumerable other things... *sputter, sputter* but if God asks me to mend a relationship I am not ready to work on... "hold everything! can't do that God, sorry, I'm going to go hide over there in the corner, but thanks for asking."
2-There is another barrier I put there, of course, "if I read my Bible, will you make [this happen]?" I detest that very thought, it makes me sad and ashamed that for one minute instead of doing the very little I believe God is asking me to do right now, I'm saying... "I expect to see a specific return on this investment." Or what? Who am I to give ultimatums to God?
You know what my wise friend said after I finished spilling my guts? "Don't let anything keep you from reading the Bible."
Hmm... lame excuses abound... when will we get over them and do what we should? I feel as if someone needs to drop a sign on my head (no not literally God, because I'm sure it'd be a doozy and I'd be sorry for even stating it).
6 comments:
I completely feel you on that one...we've had discussions about this recently, and I still struggle with it, and I recognize, almost daily, my reluctance or my inability to put everything else aside for awhile and just read my Bible...why is this so hard?! I feel regret and shame as I head to bed, knowing that yet another day has passed and I haven't bothered to set aside time for Him. I'm not sure what I need to get me back on track...maybe somebody to hold me accountable? I don't know...
I struggle with this and I saw this study where Older Christians (70's and up) were asked what they struggled with most in the Daily Walks with Christ. By a Large Margin Reading the Bible every day was #1. Why is this? Satan does not want God's People getting fed and plants thoughts and feeling to keep up from reading our Bibles. It gives us Strength and Ammo against everything he throws against us.
I know why reading your Bible is hard: it's boring.
That's interesting Kevin, because I don't find it boring. Which is why I don't understand why it's so difficult for me. It would make a lot more sense if it did bore me.
I think your first reason is very valid. Reading the Bible can be dangerous. Too often when I seriously read it I am made too aware of things I should stop doing or things I need to get off my lazy butt and start doing. It's like the prayer "test me Lord, and show me what I need to change to be more like you want me to be." Good grief! That's almost suicidal! It's like, I don't know, picking up a cross or something...
On the hand, yeah, sometimes it does seem pretty boring; and like Winter said, because we've read it before. Familiarity doesn't necessarily breed contempt, but it does breed a "been there, done that" attitude. It takes a lot (more humility than I can often muster) to go back to a familiar text and allow God to truly speak to you from it.
But your initial friend's comment about not letting anything keep you from it is good (of course, this is a do-as-I-say-not-as-I-do recommendation...)
I think you may be right about the consequences of reading the Bible. Nothing is expected of us when we read fiction. All that is hoped for is that it was enjoyable to us. Sometimes reading the Bible is not enjoyable-we learn something about ourselves that is painful. We learn something from God which means we have to change the way we think about or relate to HIm, life, or others. We can read a self-help book, and the author is not going to check to see if we have implemented what we read. However, God is expecting us to interact with His book. It's kind of scary.
I say all of this having been a Christian for many years, serving in vocational ministry, and I still struggle every day to read my Bible, not just to read it, but to hear God speak through it. I have beat myself up for finding it easier to read other books on ministry or faith than to read the book that those books are based upon. I think maybe most of us are a lot like Paul-not doing the good we would want to do, but instead doing the evil we do not want. We know what we need to do most of the time, it's that application that suffers.
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