Lacey

Friends,

Five years have passed since I woke up to the news that Lacey H* had died. Life would never be the same after that autumn day in 2002. Bewildered. Speechless. Stunned. Confused. Hollow. Broken. All aptly describe the range of feelings and emotions that swelled in my mind and heart while driving down Hwy 421 to see Lacey’s mom, who, I am certain, felt those things even more acutely than myself. Five years have passed, but it only seems like yesterday.

Much pastoral and theological advice has been given in recent years concerning how one should think about and respond to euthanasia and physician-assisted suicide. Less attention, however, has been devoted to the substantially larger number of people who have ended their lives in other ways and for other reasons. Suicide is estimated to be the third leading cause of death among teenagers and second among college students. It seems that young people are more susceptible to such thoughts and actions in circumstances when their defenses are fragile, demands increase, rage is repressed, or grace is denied. Unfortunately, most of us know those conditions all too well, for they are the conditions of human life.As I reflect back on Lacey’s life and death, I can’t help but notice that suicide testifies to the brokenness of life. To recognize this is to acknowledge the element of struggle in creation, the gap between what is and what ought to be. That autumn day, like so many days before and since, was full of promise, tasks, and grace. That autumn day, like so many before and since, was full of rejection, failure, and obstacles. Lacey, like all of us, lived with that tension, and her legacy is one of both beauty and struggle.

I am always amazed at how the rhythms of the Christian year speak to life in amazing and unexpected ways. It is somehow fitting that Christians look to their exemplars for inspiration tomorrow on All Saints’ Day (Nov. 1), for I will certainly be thinking of a teenager whose contagious laugh and generous spirit still speak in beautiful and unexpected ways. Lacey’s life was full of grace, and she shared it with us unreservedly. Lacey’s life was full of obstacles, and we did our best to face them with her. We were profoundly touched by her life and deeply moved by her death. May our memory of her inspire and motivate us in our effort to bridge the gulf between that which is and that which should be.

May the Lord, mighty Lord, bless and keep you forever.
Grant you peace, perfect peace, courage in every endeavor.
Lift your eyes and see His face, know His grace forever.
May the Lord, mighty Lord, Bless and keep you forever, Amen.

Grace and peace,
John *
Ordinary Time
31 October 2007